BP: Honesty


“It's not normal to be honest. What is normal is to be concerned foremost with having a good cover story. Normal people are concerned with figuring out the right thing to say that puts them in the best light. They want to live up to their own best guess about what the people they are talking to want to hear.”

― Brad Blanton

Radical Honesty: How to Transform Your Life by Telling the Truth

On a first date, a first meeting, an interview, how much emphasis do we put on looking good and how many lies do you think we really tell? It’s typically quite a few. We aren’t used to being honest. We definitely aren’t trained to be honest, FULLY honest.

We are typically trained to be nice, polite, appropriate, kind, generous, mindful of others, and the list goes on.

What if we lived in a way to be totally honest. To share openly and answer the people who ask us questions straightly and with a real commitment to their best interest too? What could become possible if we voiced our concerns and disagreement to the people with whom we had them?

If rather than holding in and resisting what was there for us, we let it flow and expressed, being free to love and free to give.

Why do we hesitate to share our love especially? It is one of the things that brings us the most joy and yet is so frequently withheld. It seems that a breakthrough that happens for people commonly in the body presentations, out of having to share honestly, completely honestly with nowhere to hide, that sharing in general becomes easier.

What happens is that the innate urge to hold in is released and people are free to be, free to express, free to love. Free to share their desires, fears, love and realizations with the people around them. Free to stand for the causes that matter to them.

Free to approach people they are attracted to and speak with them. Free to talk about our desires, love, fear and disagreements with the people we love. The ability to give ourselves to others, even in these small ways grows and expands. The fear around what could happen if people don’t accept what we offer is lessened.

Or even if it’s not lessened, it’s disproved, piece by piece. Because when we fully share about ourselves from head to toe, in full naked honesty, there is really nothing left to give, in the physical sense. And by living through that, growing from it, and being much less afraid and more comfortable than could be imagined causes us to have evidence against our stories.

Against the story that we may be rejected. That we may not have anything to give. That giving ourselves could be dangerous. Whatever it may be.

And what’s left is evidence that we DO have something to give. That we DO have the ability to give ourselves to others in a place where they don’t criticize or reject us. That we are ok. That we are enough. That we are loved.

You are ok. You are enough. You are loved.


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© 2019 Olivia Pavlov