A new world of relationship

Missing the place of being head over heels in love. I forgot how good that feeling is. How completing. Like an orgasm, but less fleeting. Security and stability and warmth and super excitement.

Drunkenness, too high, too happy. From a place where it isn't quite stable. Lately it's like a place of holding back, looking too much, searching, checkboxes, do they/don't they, how do I feel? I create being present and letting myself get swept away and being girly and frivolous.

Who do I really think I am looking for? Am I looking?

Did I find it already? Is it in everyone?