BP: Having what you want
It’s a common theme, there are things people want and yet don’t have in their life. There are things people have in their life they don’t want.
Imagine if your life was actually a true reflection of what you want.
If the house you have is actually the house you want. The butt cheek you have is actually the butt cheek you want. The partner you have is actually the partner you want. The job…car…amount of time off…daily schedule…food in your fridge…hair color…meal plan…outlets for expression. Get where I am going? How powerful could that be!
The closer my life looks to what I say I want, the greater my personal satisfaction and real sense of contentment is. There is a sense of being settled and also of gratification and gratitude for the things I have, the people around me, and the experiences I have. And I want that satisfaction for everyone.
Also important, take a look at what it could be like to eliminate the things you have but don’t want. Don’t want that shirt? Get rid of it! That muffin top? Get rid of it! The relationship you really aren’t committed to but stay in not to be alone? Get rid of it! That chair you never use? Get rid of it! The obligation to give Christmas gifts? Get rid of it! The trip to the city your mom has always wanted to visit but that you have no interest in going to? Get rid of it!
Having things in our life that we don’t want is just as diminishing and discouraging as not having the things we want.
The mismatch of our internal state/being and the external world we create is detrimental to so many pieces of ourselves as humans. However most of us have mismatches in life.
Things aren’t hopeless though, we aren’t doomed to a life of mismatch. It is possible to discover that we get to have a say in the matter. And then do something about it. Then create a match. A reflection of what we want being what we have in life.
A big starting point is to accept what you’ve got and what you “don’t got.” To accept what is gives us both clear vision and room to stop resisting the mismatch. Then we can actually do something about it.
A great place to start is with your body. It’s something you carry around with you every day, you won’t loose it till you die, and it’s highly likely there are mismatches between what you’ve got and what you want. Even better, it’s highly malleable.
This is where body presentations come in. Even though we carry this skin-bag of a body around with us every day, our resistance, discord, and very often simple ignoring of what it is doing/saying/feeling/experiencing is widespread and common!
Body presentations give each person a few moments to take stock of what you’ve got and what you “don’t got.” To tune in and take a look at your experience of yourself. How is your internal experience? What can you be grateful for? Good digestion, a healthy heart, having minimal surgery on your body, thick full hair? What parts have you been resisting? Where do you have pain? Where do you have shame?
Taking a full inventory is amazing and freeing. Getting to look at what you want and what you don’t want about your body is a starting point that then gives you something to work with.
A few real examples of things that have changed for people in this manner after doing body presentations:
- One woman in her 20’s shared her breasts had never felt like her own, or a part of her body she wanted. After her body presentation, she got freedom around that and then accept that is how she felt for the first time in her life.
- A man in his 50’s had for a long time disliked the shape of his belly and had lots of stomach issues to boot. After body presentations, he experienced a flattening of his stomach and a decrease in the stomach trouble. He cites a shifted relationship with food as a source. Though his actual eating habits didn’t change much, he gave up feeling guilty about eating and accepted his current state and body and appetite. He started to talk to himself about nourishing himself with each bite instead.
- Another man in his 30’s had the belief that he was “scrawny” and not as strong as other men his age. He accepted that after body presentations and shortly thereafter started doing daily pushups. He is now up to 100 pushups per day, a feat previously thought to be impossible and that he had never created before in his life. He has also of course visibly gained muscle mass and definition in his shoulders and chest and feels his own strength.
- Another woman in her 20’s previously found herself relatively “inorgasmic” having had only 3 orgasms to date that she could recall. Within a week of body presentations, after sharing about her experience of her pussy and what she enjoyed about it, reported having had several orgasms, both alone and with a new partner she sought out. Further, she reported feeling incredibly connected to her partner in her sexual experience in a way she had never before experienced. And experienced totally novel body sensations too.
These are just a few people who after body presentations had a shift and now experience that what they have in their lives matches what they say they want.
Bring awareness to your life. Look for the matches/mismatches in what you have and what you want. Accept what is there. Then get creative and find ways to bring these closer into alignment.
It comes down to taking action, and being freed up to take that action. Action could be consciously creating new thought patterns, seeking a new partner, voicing dissatisfaction about a current circumstance.
Remember: YOU get to say how it goes. YOU get to create your life. YOU can have what you want! Get to it!